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How to become an awesome programmer for £5.


Robin
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Well, as most of you know, I'm an old face around these parts. I've been programming these small games since 2003.

Still, I managed to amaze myself last month by waking up and finding out my button code re-written as if by magic!

Originally, it was a bit of a mess. A few subroutines handling the graphica changes for BTN_HOVER, BTN_NORMAL and BTN_PRESSED. These were reset when the mouse was hovered over the form, and set to different states depending on the mouse state when hovering over the graphics.

It was spread over a load of different areas.

I woke up in the morning, and my entire code was re-programmed into 10 lines!

My secret:

Pills.

In a state of ecstasy, I came home, opened up my code, and re-did the entire thing into a little loop which checks if the mouse is over a button, and then reads the buttons X, Y, Width, Height, the directory paths of each button state and and actual state of the button from a binary file. It's all automatic, and each button is stored in a simple array!

So, if you want to become an awesome programmer for £5, go outside and make some friends, get in touch with your local dealer and buy a few pills! You get high as a fucking kite, and improve your code.

Word of warning though, don't do it too much. I mixed pills and beer a while back and my hands have been shaking horribly ever since xD
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@Rage:

> Fail.
> on second thought does weed work too?

It depends. I've sometimes done pretty well after a few joints, but if you do it too much, you'll become really stupid.

Mate of mine was smoking his way through an 8th every couple of days. He's pretty much mentally retarded now :P
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Seriously? X? Wow. XD

Now wonder why you kissed a guy for pills! Hmm don't you get too stir-crazy programming while on it? I know I couldn't do it while using X, I need to be out with people to enjoy it.

@Rage:

> Fail.
> on second thought does weed work too?

Yeah, especially if you eat it (brownies, firecrackers). You get the bodyhigh and the feel good feeling but you aren't quite zoned out like you get while smoking.
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@Anna:

> Seriously? X? Wow. XD
>
> Now wonder why you kissed a guy for pills! Hmm don't you get too stir-crazy programming while on it? I know I couldn't do it while using X, I need to be out with people to enjoy it.

I was out whilst on Pills. I'd gone through the 'Doped out stage' where I was unresponsive on a couch chewing a bleach bottle, then I found some other girl on pills and we found some dry paint brushes and stroked each other's faces with them.

Then I just got to the point where I couldn't blink, after 2 hours of originally taking them, dropped the last 2 pills, got a taxi home around 3am, loaded up my computer and managed to program that xD
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@Robin:

> I was out whilst on Pills. I'd gone through the 'Doped out stage' where I was unresponsive on a couch chewing a bleach bottle, then I found some other girl on pills and we found some dry paint brushes and stroked each other's faces with them.
>
> Then I just got to the point where I couldn't blink, after 2 hours of originally taking them, dropped the last 2 pills, got a taxi home around 3am, loaded up my computer and managed to program that xD

You left out some details, but that's OK. We can imagine the other stuff XD.

Regards,
  Gdlord.
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Yeah another thing, I know a lot of X pills are cut with amphetamines, so you get some energy and focus from that too.

@Robin:

> I was out whilst on Pills. I'd gone through the 'Doped out stage' where I was unresponsive on a couch chewing a bleach bottle, then I found some other girl on pills and we found some dry paint brushes and stroked each other's faces with them.
>
> Then I just got to the point where I couldn't blink, after 2 hours of originally taking them, dropped the last 2 pills, got a taxi home around 3am, loaded up my computer and managed to program that xD

Oh wow at the paintbrushing part. You ever do the flu mask+vaporub trick? XD
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@Anna:

> Yeah another thing, I know a lot of X pills are cut with amphetamines, so you get some energy and focus from that too.
> Oh wow at the paintbrushing part. You ever do the flu mask+vaporub trick? XD

Nope. We rubbed some cigarette papers for a while though, they were amazing.
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@Anna:

> It's because you think you're more creative. But really I think it's more that you just have less inhibitions so you're willing to try more creative risks than you otherwise would.

Eh, I agree to a point. I can only talk about my own experiences however. Generally, the programming side I find very easy. It's just thinking about the best way to implement a system. I usually have a nap before adding in a huge system.

Take my new skills system for example. It required me to re-write the entire system and also edit up all the existing stuff that was built on it. I had a complete blank when thinking of the best way to work on it, but I went for a lie-down for an hour, came back, and I knew exactly what to do.

It happens with a lot of things. I wake up in the morning, and know exactly how to do something.

With Pills, it's sort of similar. It's thinking time. I'm there concentrating on how smooth someone's face is, and end up working things out in my mind without even thinking about them.
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