Jokes

[MikeyB2k9]

Hey Hey! We all need a bit of humour in our lives, that's why every forum must have a jokes section! - This one doesnt appear to have a section for it, so lets start by making a "Jokes" post in the Chit Chat section :)

Here you can post jokes about anything remotely funny! Can be jokes from elsewhere, jokes you've made up, or even just a funny things that happened once in your life - Best thing is, no one will ever know :) unless of course you use "Why did the chicken cross the road"? I mean FFS no one cares about the damn chicken, I mean what would be remotely funny about a chicken crossing a road? Unless of course he was singing, then gets hit by a bus! WHAM!

Anyways, that kinda brings back a memory from last night.

I was with this girl and she asked me; "Mikey, Will I be just another notch on your bedpost"?

I carefully took her by the hand, looked her in the eyes and quietly replied; "Don't be silly, if I notch my bedposts anymore they're gonna fall apart!"

Keep it rolling guys!

[defendersdef]

hey hey?

you know who the biggest whore in the whole world is?

mrs. packman cause she ate balls untill she died

also, she  is the biggest prostitute cause she only costs 25 cents a play

[yorty]

All those smileys ruined it. Why did the chicken cross the road?

[defendersdef]

@Yorty:

> All those smileys ruined it. Why did the chicken cross the road?

why?

[Marsh]

There was this guy. He often went away on trips, far from home, Long trips. While this man was away on his trips, his wife would get very very dissatisfied. Thus, she cheated on him, but when he came back, she felt guilty, so she always told him. Well, after a while, the man got very frustrated with his wife's adultry, so he went to an adult toy shop. He looked around, but saw nothing special.

The man knew he needed something special, so he decided to tell the salesclerk. "I need something really amazing for my wife. All I see here are normal toys."

"Well, there is the voodoo dick, but I don't want to sell you THAT." replied the clerk.

"Let me see it anyway!" Answered the man.

The salesclerk took him into a room and pulled out a box. He opened the box, and inside was something that looked like a normal toy.

"That's not special!" cried the man.

"Ah, but look. VOODOO DICK DOOR." The dick in the box got up and fucked the door to pieces splinters everywhere. .

"I'll take that, but how do you get it to stop?"

The salesclerk sold him the voodoo dick, then, said simply "Voodoo dick  box."

So the man took voodoo dick back home to his wife and showed her how to get it to hump something. Then, he left for a trip.

The wife waited and waited and waited, but she couldn't stand her urges. She took out the voodoo dick and said "voodoo dick? My-" well, we know what she said. So, it was the best she had ever known, and she kept at it for about 3 hours. Then, she wanted it out. She pulled and pulled, but in vain, for her husband had forgotten to tell her about the little box trick. Finally, she decided to go to the hospital to get it out. She drove kind of wacky, well, because there was something in her. Finally, a police man pulled her over for her driving.

"But…" She told the police man of the voodoo dick, to get out of the ticket.

He laughed at her foolish story. "Voodoo dick my ass!" he cried.

[Dthen]

Nice Marsh. Made me lol.

[jna]

Haha Marsh thats a good one.

[MikeyB2k9]

lol yeah thats a good one marsh :)

I got some good ones but theyre probably a bit racy to go on here so i'll keep clear of those lol :)

[defendersdef]

why does the galaxar ship keeps firing at the aliens?

cause the aliens want his white stuff

[Marsh]

@defendersdef:

> why does the galaxar ship keeps firing at the aliens?
>
> cause the aliens want his white stuff

I dont get it, wtf is a galaxar ship? this some star trek reference im missing or something?