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Read a KH-related story for my game?


Zexion
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I'm looking for several opinions on a story I wrote for my game. If you are willing to read through a pretty lengthy wall of text, please pm me! The story is for a kingdom hearts related game I am making. Has been in production as of January aimed for release in December, but the date is subject to change if needed.

Like I said, PM, or even post if you are interested. Also, feel free to leave your review here instead of pm. It's all up to you :P
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Just sent it to you.

I hope it's not too confusing. I might have said the name "Bit" in some places and "Bane" in others. They are the same person. I recently renamed him and now I suffer from traumatic name change disorder.
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Wow, I liked it!

I've been playing KH since the very beginning and I'm pretty caught up with the plot/story (which IS confusing to someone new to the games).

I feel if players knew the basics of the plot, they could easily understand all of your story.

(Probably irrelevant) But if this ever finds it's way to a project board or something similar, I would capitalize Unknown.

Cheers!
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Thanks for the feedback! I made this in a random text file just off the top of my head. I know that sounds…bad, but I had been thinking about it for a while. Needless to say, I didn't exactly run a spell check on it or clean it up at all. I will make sure to do that on the project thread though :)
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Lol as i read the story.. i always tell to myself that "I think i already read or heard this before" but i don't actually remember where.. hehe..

nice story by the way, but i think you should try to add some scene where you put the readers to expect more on this story
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Thank you for reading. I understand where you are coming from, but don't worry I will add some more engaging plot stuffs when it comes down to it in the game. As I said, this was done in a night on wordpad and it's only ment to be the base of the story. There will be tons of details once it's completed!
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