New Storyline

[Skillzalot]

A friend and I have been working on a storyline. This is just the basics so C&C greatly appreciated

> Chapter 1: The formation of Vulgus-Silicis
>     The planet was formed before the universe itself came
> into fruition. It was created by magic essence left
> from the grand creator named Drezieli. He gave the space
> magic but in doing so he died. The planet was made with
> lush forests, blazing desserts and barren tundra. 
>  
>
> Chapter 2: The Arrival of Life
>     About 200 years after Vulgus-Silicus was formed, life
> began. This life was simpler no more then one-celled
> life forms. The god Noryzats thought this was taking
> too long so he decided to speed it up. This was his
> mortal mistake. Instead of becoming one massive race
> like it was supposed to be, it separated into 7 major
> races, Human, Dwarf, Elf, Drow Elf, Orc, Troll and
> Draconian. Each race wanted command of the land, so a
> war was broken out. From the corpses of these dead
> soldiers, a new race was born, known as the undead.
>
> Chapter 3: The separation of land
>     It use to be a peaceful place free of disasters and
> disease. It was not meant to last. The races of
> Vulgus-Silicis wanted to rule so they attacked the planet.
> Doing this caused Unus-Locus to split into 7 distinct areas
> known as Incendia, Sanctus, Unda, Aer, Malum, Astrum,
> and Terra. Now that the planet has been separated, the
> races shall pay.
>
> Chapter 4: The Laceration Plague Strikes
>     45 years after the separation, something happened.
> Some of the Ogres began to get boils on their skin.
> This has never happened before. This disease spread
> wide, slowly killing the population of Vulgus-Silicis. 
>
>     The plague has been around for 2 years now. The gods
> thought the planet has suffered enough. Noryzats, the god
> of life, removed the plague. But it still did its toll.
> It mutated some of the Ogres into hideous beasts known as
> Srangith. Knowing they will never be the same, the Srangith
> left Terra. They set sail to the continent that was not
> livable. They created the first town on Unda.
>
> Chapter 5: The formation of Abithik
>     The undead sought a place of their own. Not willing to
> share with the living creatures, Aristros formed a
> collective of undead sorcerers. Aristos and the undead
> collective summoned a volcano off the coastal land.
> Molten lava and volcanic ash consumed the waters and
> coast, linking the island to the rest of the continents.
> Aristos did this so the undead could collect the bodies
> of the dead to make new warriors and add to the war.
> These linking passages were not seen by the living only
> the undead could see them.

[Hayabusa123]

I like it. ALOT. It's very interesting and can be converted into a book or play.

[Skillzalot]

Thanks man. This is just the general story line. There will also be one for each continent and one call the origin of intelligence explaining how each race evolved an all that

[Bongartist]

Is this your actual storyline or just highlights?

[Devogen]

I like it mate, its actually a pretty good read - and now im actually interested in your plot and your characters. 9/10

[Bongartist]

I'm concerned… Those seem to be very, VERY short chapters... Great word work, great word-play, just very, VERY short. I'd give it 7 or 8/10.

[vrage]

excellent storyline . it takes planning before making a book/game/play and your heading in the right direction :)

[Big J]

im a writer an in my opinion that wasn't bad