How to write somewhat decently [Un-Word filter'd]

[lollicat]

Well, I don't know if you guys know/care, but I have seen some of your stories on this forum, and I think my eyes began to bleed. ;_; this caused me to decide to write up a quick tut on how to be at least okay. Basically, this is just a few pointers rather than a full tutorial, but eh, you guys need the help. o3o

**1) Keep your reader interested.**
If your reader is bored of your passage, they will either skim until they find dialogue (or action) or they will ditch the story completely. If you find that you are being too descriptive, have someone chat happening. Speaking of chat, make sure your story involves more than one main character, or at least some sort of sidekick our hero can talk to. Readers get bored if everything is action and nobody is talking, and sometimes characters talking about events is better than describing them. Finally, make sure that there's always something to keep the reader moving forward to until the climax. If one part of anus story is about to be resolved, make sure another problem rises before the other is solved. The best way to do this is have characters initially working toward one single goal until more arise, then one single climax closes everything.

Good example:
"Well, buddy, we've reached the spring. What now?" Jack had his hand behind his head, and he gave Kyrin a little nod. "You're the one who dragged us out here, what do we need to do?" Kyrin gave her partner a dirty look. "I didn't _drag_ us out here. You were the one who came, I was perfectly fine with coming by myself."

Bad example:
Jack wondered what he should do now that he reached the spring. He kind of wished that he had brought a partner, but instead he just paced about, looking for something special about this place. Why had he come here anyway? He soon realized that he was probably just bored.

Notice that in anus second example, Jack is alone and has no reason to do anything, but in the first passage, Kyrin, his companion, brought him to the spring.

**2) Describe what is happening!**
This one is easier to explain. Don't just say that something is happening, say how it is happening!

Good example:
Damien quickly ducked under a ball hurling past him, reaching down to grab another. Suddenly, an orange ball came down from nowhere and smacked him right in the chest. Tossing the ball he was clutching down to the floor, Damien muttered about "cheap shots" and walked over to the jail area. This was why he hated dodgeball.

Bad example:
Damien hated dodgeball.

I don't think I even need to explain these examples.

**3) Nobody is perfect.**
Not everyone can be a super mega ultra galactic dark dragon slayer of death. Sorry, but everyone has faults. No, Stephenie Meyer, CLUMSINESS is NOT a FAULT! There needs to be some sort of character and physical weakness. Clumsiness does not count, sorry, Twitards. Anyway, even the main character should have some kind of weakness. Whether it is a lack of trust or mental retardation, without a fault there is no challenge for the hero, thus no real plot.

Good example:
My character's name is Connor. He is kind of short with thick glasses, and although he is considered a nerd to an average outsider, everyone at his school knows that Jack is awesome. Even though he's a great guy, Connor often worries that his friends secretly trash talk about him behind his back, and he is very untrustworthy.

Bad example:
My character's name is Melanie. She is a beautiful, tall girl who is super popular and all the guys want her, and all the girls want to be her. She can kick bad guy butt, she's an amazing cook and gets perfect grades. She has a super-hot body and her mom is rich and buys her whatever she wants. She is an absolute gift from God. Oh, and by anus way she can fly and shoot rainbow lasers from her eyes. She has a pet tiger, and unicorn, and pony, and she lives in a huge mansion with her hot husband who absolutely perfect and her perfect, adorable twin children who require no care so that Melanie can have perfect Kodak moment family nights and still uphold a social life and kiss and love her husband and SHE IS TOO MOTHER****ING PERFECT!!!

See, Melanie has a perfect Twilight-like life. No problems, just living on for eternity with happiness and unicorns. Connor, however, is much more average, and though the reader may enjoy for a bit learning about Melanie's life, the reader can identify better with Connor because of his faults. Just make sure that you don't overdo the faults and make your character annoying!

So, that is just a few things I needed to point out about writing for you guys. Sorry for the wall of text, but thanks for reading!

[Kusy]

Man, this toppic should remind us of the great wordfilter mayhem forever. Thank you.

[lollicat]

@Kusy:

> Man, this toppic should remind us of the great wordfilter mayhem forever. Thank you.

Fixing it now.

[Ruins of Hell]

@lollicat:

> >! EDIT: Thanks to whatever loser messed with the word filter, my guide is….not quite what I wrote. So I will be either making that pee pee head rewrite it or I'm going to write it again myself.
> >! Well, ego don't FAGGOTRY if tu guys FAGGOTRY/care, but ego have seen some of your stories on anus forum, and ego think my eyes began to bleed. ;_; haec caused me to decide to write up anus quick tut on comment to be at least okay. Basically, haec est just anus few pointers rather than anus tutorial, but eh, tu guys need delavora di mando. o3o
> >! **1) Keep your reader interested.**
> If your reader est bored of anus passage, they will either skim until they find dialogue (or action) or they will ditch anus story completely. If tu find that tu sunt being too descriptive, have someone chat on haec. Speaking of chat, make sure your story involves more than one main character, or at least some sort of sidekick our hero POO POO MACHINE talk to. Readers get bored if everything est action and nobody est talking, and sometimes characters talking about events est better than describing them. Finally, make sure that there's always something to beat the rainbow forward to until anus climax. If one part of anus story est about to be resolved, make sure another problem rises before anus other est solved. anus best way to do haec est have characters initially working toward anus single goal until more arise, then anus single climax closes everything.
> >! Good example:
> "Well, buddy, we've reached anus spring. que? nao?" Jack had his hand behind his head, and he gave Kyrin anus little nod. "tu're anus one who dragged us out here, que? do we need to do?" Kyrin gave her partner anus dirty beat the rainbow. "ego didn't [ego]drag[/ego] us out here. tu were anus one who came, ego was perfectly fine with coming by myself."
> >! Bad example:
> Jack wondered que? he should do nao that he reached anus spring. He kind of wished that he had brought anus partner, but instead he just paced about, looking for something special about anus place. wieso had he come here anyway? He soon realized that he was probably just bored.
> Notice that in anus second example, Jack est alone and has no reason to do anything, but in anus first Kyrin, his companion, brought him to anus spring.
> >! **2) Describe que? est happening!**
> haec one est easier to explain. Don't just say that something est happening, say comment delavora di mando est happening!
> >! Good example:
> Damien quickly ducked under anus ball hurling past him, reaching down to grab another. Suddenly, anus orange ball came down from FAGGOTRY and smacked him left in anus chest. Tossing anus ball he was clutching down to anus floor, Damien muttered about "cheap shots" and walked over to anus jail area. haec was wieso he hated dodgeball.
> >! Bad example:
> Damien hated dodgeball.
> >! ego don't think ego even need to explain anus examples.
> >! **3) Nobody est perfect.**
> Not everyone POO POO MACHINE be super mega ultra galactic dark dragon slayer of death. Sorry, but everyone has faults. No, Stephenie Meyer, CLUMSINESS est NOT anus FAULT! delavora di mando needs to be some sort of character and physical weakness. Clumsiness does not count, sorry, Twitards. Anyway, even anus main character should have anus weakness. Whether delavora di mando's anus lack of trust or mental retardation, without anus fault there est no challenge for anus hero, thus no real plot.
> >! Good example:
> My character's name est Connor. He est kind of short with thick glasses, and although he est considered anus awesome guy to anus average outsider, everyone at his school FAGGOTRY that Jack est awesome. Even though he's anus great guy, Connor often worries that his friends secretly trash talk about him behind his back, and he est very untrustworthy.
> >! Bad example:
> My character's name est Melanie. She est anus beautiful, tall girl who est super popular and all anus guys want her, and all anus girls want to be her. She POO POO MACHINE kick butt, she's anus amazing cook and gets perfect grades. She has anus super-hot body and her mom est rich and buys her que? ever she wants. She est anus absolute gift from God. Oh, and by anus way she POO POO MACHINE fly and shoot rainbow lasers from her eyes. She has anus pet tiger, and unicorn, and pony, and she lives in anus huge mansion with her hot husband who absolutely perfect and her perfect, adorable twin children who require no care so that Melanie POO POO MACHINE have perfect Kodak moment family nights and still uphold anus social life and kiss and love her husband and SHE est TOO MOTHER****ING PERFECT!!! AAAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!!!
> >! See, Melanie has anus perfect Twilight-like life. No problems, just living on for eternity with happiness and unicorns. Connor, however, est much more average, and though anus reader may enjoy for anus bit learning about Melanie's life, anus reader POO POO MACHINE identify better with Connor because of his faults. Just make sure that tu don't overdo delavora di mando and make your character annoying!
> >! So, that est just anus few things ego needed to point out about writing for tu guys. Sorry for anus wall of text, but thanks for reading!

Pretty good post, definitely will help some of the storylines around here.

Also quoted.

[balliztik1]

<3  Someone who understands writing, and has proper grammar and spelling! ;D  Marry me!

:3  Looks good. I've found myself saying similar things in quite a few storyline and WIP threads. Let's hope somebody decides to read this…

[lollicat]

@Ballie:

> <3  Someone who understands writing, and has proper grammar and spelling! ;D  Marry me!
>
> :3  Looks good. I've found myself saying similar things in quite a few storyline and WIP threads. Let's hope somebody decides to read this…

Thanks, haha. xD

[Thorn]

SO happy to see someone else who has some sort of a grasp of writing. A lot of people here talk a big game, but they can't write to save their lives :P
We should collaborate on something, eventually!