Monpsules Manga (10%)

[Mytsaw]

Hi! I am creating a manga of my game ( the game is based on the manga :P ) and i want to share it with you


Genre : Action , Adventure , Mystery

Theme : The story is based on a 17 jaden naoki. jaden naoki become the leader of the naoki clan when his parents died in monpsules world everyone can have super powers just by using some gemstones called capsules every capsule have different monster sealed an if someone use a capsule he can use their powers

First chapter : A Big war between Naoki clan  And Shivils Clan jaden try to get revange becaouse on of shivils leaders kill jaden's friend but the learn something weird about this leader

the manga isn't ready yet but i will write the proggres here

–----------- `20 % ------------

Script - Ready 100%

Names - Ready  100%

Rough Version - Not Ready 0%

Final Pages - Not Ready 0%

Digital Edit - Not Ready 0%

[Dr.House]

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[Agoraphobic]

A good writer needs to check the grammatical coherence of your sentences (i.e capitalization, grammar, spelling,etc). No matter how good your story is, if it looks a mess, no one will read it.

Below I took what you wrote and just added some fluff to have a basic starting point. From there you want to keep adding onto it, more adjectives,etc.

What you wrote;

> Theme : The story is based on a 17 jaden naoki. jaden naoki become the leader of the naoki clan when his parents died in monpsules world everyone can have super powers just by using some gemstones called capsules every capsule have different monster sealed an if someone use a capsule he can use their powers
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> First chapter : A Big war between Naoki clan  And Shivils Clan jaden try to get revange becaouse on of shivils leaders kill jaden's friend but the learn something weird about this leader
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> the manga isn't ready yet but i will write the proggres here

An example of a basic starting point for your story;

> At the end of the second age, mystic gems called "Capsules" were discovered across the land. The Capsules were buried in long forgotten temples. Holding the Capsule allowed for the bearer to channel their personal energy into the creature being held inside the Capsule. If enough energy is channeled to the trapped creature and the bearer's mind is strong enough, he could command the monster to appear. 
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> The monster would obey their master without fail, as the Capsule grants the summoner the ability to ensnare or at the very least compel the monster to submit. It's not uncommon for people to befriend their monsters and build an unbreakable bond. Unfortunately there is also conjurers who would enslave the monster and rob it of all free will and though. 
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> In the city of Valice the Naoki clan ruled with honor and justice. The Naoki clan had ruled for over a century and today was the celebration of the clan leader's son; Jaden Naoki. Jaden will turn 17 today and face the trials to pass into manhood. After the test, Jaden will be declared the next clan leader and thus ruler of all the Naoki land. Unfortunately shadowed men had arrived in Valice and they come with a dark purpose that would change young Jaden's life forever…..