Halo3: ODST The story I wrote :)

[Kroeckinator]

Sergeant Johnson could feel the sweat drip from his face, he knew that if he messed up, the enemy Jackal would snipe him. Johnson glanced around the rock-covered battlefield, if only he could find a stronger weapon then his SMG. Behind a large rock he spotted an RPG, he knew he only had one chance. He started to sprint to the next rock, but stopped, his entire leg went numb. He saw the blood rugged dirt floor, he knew he was going to die. He rolled over to the RPG, picked it up, loaded it, and fired at the Jackal. Johnson saw the building explode, he looked at all the dead Marines, then at the sky, as he closed his eyes.
“Hey Rook, you ready”? asked a masked ODST. Mercer pulled his mask over his face and stepped into the drop-pod. The screen flashed on and somebody with a recon helmet on appeared on-screen. “Hello, I am Sgt. Jay, we will be dropping into New Mombasa soon”. The screen shut off and Mercer felt his pod rumble, then all of the sudden it started to drop. He stared at the banshee’s and phantom’s firing at the Pillar of Autumn, then all of the sudden he got hit by an explosion. All of the lights in the pod were flashing red, Mercer looked around to see if his pod was damaged. His pod started to turn upside down, then Sgt. Jay appeared on the screen, “Mercer, are you alright”?!
The pod smashed into a building and landed on West Ave. Street, after a few minutes Mercer crawled out from beneath the rubble. Mercer looked at his surroundings, everything was blurred, so he took off his helmet and started to clean the visor. After he put the helmet back on he watched as a few Hunter’s walked out from behind a wall. Mercer reached for his SMG and almost fainted, he left it in the pod! By now the Hunter’s started to fire, Mercer grabbed the bag full of health packs and ran into an old hospital.

Well… Thats chapter 1... what do you think, i just started writing, and im hoping to get better!

(Please dont be afraid to say it sucks)
(I never played Halo ODST)

[Dthen]

Johnson isn't badass enough.
Please fix that.

Also, some of the dialogue style doesn't seem to suit a Halo theme.