R: FoF Storyline, rewriting?

[Akselj]

So, I've heard that the storyline (by DDunit) needs rewriting. Any tips, ideas or rewritings?

As narrated by Kaelin, the god of knowledge

  Ages ago, in the land of humans, the gods were arguing about something… One god said he was made the first, while another said he was the first too. The fact that they were twin brother doesn't arrange that. They were born almost at the same time. Thinking back, I know that Avian was born before Ezus. Avian's hair was blond, while his brother's was black. Ezus started causing feud at a very young age while Avian was basicly a perfect child. Their destinies, and paths were very afar one from eachother. Iziur, their father, knowing what would happen, retreated back in the ancient world, far from his wretched sons.

  Well, this feud went farther the I though it would be. Ezus disapeared while clueless Avian went to search for the other gods. He united Guill god of hunting, Pirut god of forests and Louwy god of seas. Ezus united Hephus god of forging, Krabe god of sins and Tul'Adhan god of fire. The other gods, anoyyed by this feud, also left to the ancient world.

  After hundreds of years, this feud is still goind on. Some gods came back and formed other factions. This created new races, since the gods leading those factions modified the body of their fidels. The factions that exist now are: The Light faction, led by Avian. The dread faction, led by Ezus. The Areus faction, led by Divur. The earth faction, led by Kurogane. And a small faction that is the least known about, The Rebels.

  I see you want to know more about these Rebels... Well, they're led by a human named Aiden, a dwarf named Juro and an elf named Yzis. They're the leaders of groups of races that want to end the war. You want this to end. Or you might want this to never end..? It's your choice. The one thing the we gods have no power over is, your freedom. We just control your mind, but freedom is still there somewhere. You can hope. Hope...

If anyone would rewrite it, I would appreciate it.

--AkselJ