[W.I.P] Enthalion

[MadalinV]

> Quite a few spelling mistakes in your GUI. Mistery (Mystery) and Throught (Throughout)

where?

> Is English your native tongue? If not, please do consider this as a tip: You might wanna find someone who is good with English and fix those spellings and grammars. A game with improper spellings/grammars will ruin it. So yeah, I'm not saying your English is not understandable, it's just, the spelling and grammar matters.

where are the mistakes?

[juvanio]

> where? where are the mistakes?

There are a lot which in which I can't just point out easily, same with the posts.

[MadalinV]

> There are a lot which in which I can't just point out easily, same with the posts.

>_> then how should I fix, if I don't know WHAT to fix?

[Socgreaser]

I could help you fix most of your grammar erros for example from this:

> Enthalion is a game that I and my team are trying to design so the player can feel the mistery and the graphics of the old days in a contemporan view. The project is just started, and the only thing done untill now is the GUI, but we are looking to make a full team. If you want to register, go [here](http://www.touchofdeathforums.com/community/index.php?/topic/130945-need-team-for-the-secret-runes-war-project/). We intend to make the game Free-To-Play, so no one will get any advantages, but there will be event-only items in-game.

to

> Enthalion is a game that my team and I are trying to develop so the player can feel the mistery and the graphics of the old days in a contemporary view. We just started the project, and the only thing finished until now is the GUI, but we are looking foward on recruiting a full team. If you want to register, go [here](http://www.touchofdeathforums.com/community/index.php?/topic/130945-need-team-for-the-secret-runes-war-project/). We intend to make the game Free-To-Play, so no one will get any advantages, but there will be event-only items in-game.

Here I tried to re write your story in a more story-ish way.

From:

> The player is put in the middle of the war, in a cave, not knowing what happened, near a wall with some runic text written on it, he notes them and goes to the right or the left of the cave, he sees ruby ore, diamond ore and other ores, he quicly sees a pickaxe, and starts mining a few of them, after that, he continues on, he then is ambushed by some monsters, and qucly grabs a rusted sword, then fights the monsters, after that, he is injuried, and continues like that. His adventure makes him go further in the cave, fighting mosters in every corner. After that, he get's out of the cave, and finds a little house, where an old woman is staying, he asks her where he is, and if she knows who is him, but the old lady asks him to do some chores first, after that, she says that she doesn't know, but maybe one of the citizens from the Fayhall kindom knows, he shws him the direction, and he continues on his quest, not knowing what is waiting for him at the next step, nor where he will be…

To:

> The player finds himself in the middle of war. He notices he is in a cave, but doesn't remember how he got there, he notices a wall filled with runic text he then tries to read the text, but he notices he has never seen this type of rune. The player wanders around the cave and sees two paths, one going to the right and another one going to the left. Either path he follows leads him to a cave swarmed with veins. He looks around and finds a pickaxe, he quickly mines a few and in a couple of minutes he finds ruby, diamond and other metals. The player then continues on but is ambushed by some monsters, somehow, he remembers how to fight. he dodges the monter's attack and quickly grabs a rusty sword, he fights the monsters and suffers minor injuries, but bears the pain, and continues like that. His adventure makes him go further in the cave, fighting mosters in every corner. After that, he get's out of the cave, he notices a cabin in the distance, and walks towards it. He knocks on the door and an old lady opens the door. The player asks him where he is or if she knew his identity. But the old lady, distrusting the player because she hasn't sen him before, asks him to do some chores for her, after that, she says that they are in her house, near the Fayhall Kingdom but that she doesn't know him, although maybe one of the inhabitants of the Fayhall Kingdom may know. She shows the player the path to the Fayhall territory and wishes good luck. The player embarks on his quest, not knowing what dangers, treasures and aventures he will find…

This is just a suggestion, just to give you an example of what I would do, but its not my game, this is in YOUR hands.

[MadalinV]

Yeah, but the story is remade(in progress), and the game details will be changed.

[juvanio]

> -snip-

These are some of the things I'm pointing out to. Nice Job, OGC Greaser.

So far, I'm following your game and it seems to be interesting. It's nice to see non-eclipse games progressing.

Regards,

Ahri

[juvanio]

-delete this, sorry for double posting, damn-

[Socgreaser]

What exactly changed? I made little changes such as the player not understanding the runes, since in your version it just said "[…] [background=rgb(247, 247, 247)]near a wall with some runic text written on it, he notes them […]" ok so what? That is not necessary at al imo but as I said, it is your game and I am just trying to help you and trying to give you an idea.[/background]

[aaaron]

Why can't I scroll down on your website? >_>

[MadalinV]

> Why can't I scroll down on your website? >_>

Oops, Forgot to delete a line in CSS with overflow=hidden xD

~~going to remove it…~~ removed it

[MadalinV]

Changed pictures in main post

[MadalinV]

Fixed the images from the topic. (They had some left over pixells)

[Synergy]

Out of interest, what's the engine being used? Is it one you've coded yourself? It's in the "non-eclipse" forum so can't be the Eclipse engine…

[MadalinV]

Its a modified version of Mirage Creation.

[Link]

I like this, looks like you mays be able to get a lot done. I knew I recognized this from somewhere, guess that also helps to tell why Lavos is working with the project.

[MadalinV]

I didnt take ideeas from anywhere.

Anyway, we will take a break in the progress of the game, since Lavos is working on a new engine, and I want to see its progress.

[Socgreaser]

Wow Who is doing the art for your wallpapers and website?

[Exception]

> Wow Who is doing the art for your wallpapers and website?

Use Google Image Search, and you'll see. :}

[MadalinV]

The website art is from el-grimlock (you can read it at the footer)

And wallpaper art is randomly picked, but it is related to the storyline.

[Socgreaser]

Well its really good, although the classes are weird in my opinion, maybe you should do a tree?

[FinalLife]

> The website art is from el-grimlock (you can read it at the footer)
>
> And wallpaper art is randomly picked, but it is related to the storyline.

You should atleast not take off the copyright marks. I mean you are using their work and giving them no credit do you not see anything wrong with that?

[MadalinV]

> You should atleast not take off the copyright marks. I mean you are using their work and giving them no credit do you not see anything wrong with that?

I didn't take off copyright from them. They are owned by the respective owners. I never claimed them as mine.

[Yuko]

May I ask what base you used?

[MadalinV]

> May I ask what base you used?

Mirage Creation Dx8 (modfied by Lavos)

[MadalinV]

this topic should be locked, since I don't work on it anymore, or even deleted, but I'd like it locked, for the time being.